Who am I?

Who am I?

My first answer would probably be my name.
But, my name does not describe who I am on the inside.
I could then give the title of my profession.
But that is what I do.
I could then tell you I am a wife, a mother, a sister, and a daughter.
But those are my relationships.

I ask again, who am I?

I could describe myself as an extrovert and outgoing.
That is my personality.
I am organized in planning events.
But that is a gift God has given me.
I could describe my appearance, but that is not who I am either.

So many times I have believed what others say I am.
If I receive affirmation, then I feel worthwhile.
However, when I receive criticism, then I feel like a failure.
I have chosen to ride the roller coaster of emotions,
Instead of believing the truth of what God says about me.
I have tried to work harder to prove that I am worthwhile.
Yet every time I mess up or fail, I am reminded that I will never measure up.

I will never be pretty enough or talented enough.
I will never be skinny enough or do enough good things of the church.
I will never be a good enough wife or mother or sister or daughter.
But, I keep trying harder and harder.
I believe the lie that if I continue to try harder, I will finally be "good" enough.

One day, God gently said to me,
"Stop trying so hard to prove yourself to others.
Get your worth from me. I've already given it to you.
Remember my grace.
It's a free gift and nothing you can achieve by trying harder.

by Shelley Hitz